Questions for St. Peter (re: light at the end of the tunnel)

Warning...this is another installment of "Random Thoughts" from the Holt household.

You know, ya hear talk all the time of the "pearly gates" that you have to go through when you die. Something about St. Peter meeting you there, etc.
Well, there is also talk about a light at the end of a tunnel when you die. It is of this tunnel, and the light, that we have some questions. If you are reading this...and you are not St. Peter, but you have ideas, please feel free to chime in.

Question #1:

How large is the tunnel? Is it large enough to walk through? Is it so small that we have to crawl through it? Could you drive a car through it? A bus? A freight liner? Ilene is very claustrophobic, so we are hoping that there is ample space and breathing room inside.

Question #2:

Is passage permitted to only one person at a time? Or will there be several people trying to go through said tunnel at the same time?
This begs another question...if there are multiple tunnel travelers at once, are there multiple people at the other end to greet them? If so, is it hard to find the person you are supposed to run to? I almost kind of picture it like the 4th of July children's races in Enterprise...

Question #3:

Just how bright is this light? Will we need sunglasses? Will we need to cover our eyes? Will it cause us to see those little blue spots if we look directly at it?

Question #4:

Are there bats in the tunnel? Calvin is terrified of bats...so he is hoping very much that the bright light will scare the bats away long before he gets there.

Question #5:

Are there pranksters up there? For instance...would a group of improv comics find some flashlights or spotlights and start shining them...just to trick people into going toward the wrong light?

There are other questions we have, which we will spare you from....at least during this post.
We hope not to offend anyone. We don't mean to be irreverent or sac religious. But, these are the kind of things we think about. Planning for the future...isn't that what we all should be doing?

Going Private, I guess.

I guess we are going to make our blog private. I am not exactly sure why. Everyone else is doing it, and we are usually ones that give in pretty easily to the peer pressure of what everyone else is doing.
I know what some of you are thinking..."if someone else's blog jumped off a cliff...would you?" And the answer is: yes!
If you want to be added to our secret combination of private blog viewers, please give us your e-mail address and we'll be happy to let you join in all the blogging fun. Whether you are a regular that we know about...or one of our secret stalkers...we'd be happy to let you aboard, just let us know. We'll probably go private by Dec. 1. Maybe...if I can figure out how to make this thing go private. If not....oh well.
OK...well thanks, sure 'prishate y'all. God bless America (especially the next 4 years).

Concession

My friends & fellow Americans:

I just got off the phone with Senator Obama. I have conceded the race.
It was a long and hard battle, on which you all were with me the entire time.
However, the American people have spoken loud and clear, and their voice was heard.

I wish to thank all of you for your support during this campaign. You have been very kind
and supportive of us during this cause. We ran a good campaign...for which I am very proud.

I want to thank my vice presidential running mate...Ellis Jepson. He really rallied our base and will be a strong political figure in the months and years to come for our party.

The worst part about this is...in anticipation of winning the White House...our family went out and bought a brand new puppy to be the "first pet". Her name is "Regina". Now, we don't know what to do with it. Anyone want a fluffy toy poodle???

Again...thank you for your support.

Holt/Jepson 2012!!